Sunday, July 17, 2011

A Dissatisfied Ancestry.com User

To Whom it May Concern,

I am writing due to my horrific experience using Ancestry.com. In order for you to appreciate how bad it was, some background information is necessary. My wife Julie and I have been married for 15 years and have a 12 year old son named Flip. Both my wife and I were abandoned we were born. Growing up in foster homes, we both beat the odds and thrived. I went to Colgate and became a lawyer; she went to Vassar and became a pediatrician. When we met, we felt like kindred spirits since our childhoods were so similar. Plus, we both have dirty blonde hair and blue eyes; everyone we encounter say we are the perfect looking couple.

While we loved our lives, we saw a commercial of yours and got curious about our backgrounds. Neither of us have ever known anything about our parents. We each felt a hole in our otherwise perfect lives. Who doesn't want to know the parts that make up their whole? We decided it was time to find our family trees.

The problem? It's the same damn tree! My wife is my sister! Obviously I thought it was strange that Flip was born with a third arm growing from his head, but he has always been healthy otherwise. Besides, he is an amazing climber which is kind of cool.

Not surprisingly, my wife and son left me. Every time we looked at each other we felt physically ill. I am quite certain I will never achieve an erection again. Had we never checked your damn site we would still be living in blissful ignorance in our huge house with our special son. (He's only 5'7" but his head arm can dunk a basketball.) I lost my job. I'm a social pariah.

I miss my wife. I miss my son and his incredible hugs. I miss my job. I hope you all rot in hell.

Chad Stephenson, former member

P.S. Your site's navigation is clunky at best.

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