(This blog won't make much sense to anyone who doesn't follow WCHA hockey. But I do, so I wrote it. Sometimes, I gotta look out for myself, you know?)
I was out of town this past weekend due to Matt’s wedding and because of this, did not see or listen to any of the UMD-St. Cloud State series this weekend. The fact that I missed it completely is the only positive thing I can think to say about that series.
Coming into this weekend, UMD had won four straight against State. I was there in person when the Bulldogs absolutely drubbed them at the DECC in late November. They completely dominated that game from start to finish. The crowd was lively and the action was good. Also, some drunken Bulldogs fan was leaning over the seat in front of him, his buddy shoved him, and he tumbled two rows down, narrowly avoiding landing on other patrons on his way down. The security guards just laughed it off. It was good times all around.
So what the hell happened? How do you get swept by a team that has at least half of their players drunk before the game? A team that fills its water bottles with Icehouse? A team whose players can’t wear mouth guards because their traps are too packed with Skoal? Before I go any further, I should point out that I have a cousin Betsy who is a State alum. She is very talented and successful. The problem is that since she went to SCSU, it kind of handcuffs me. It prevents me from making jokes like…
…I wonder if there is any truth to the rumor that State writes their grads’ diplomas on the back of cocktail napkins.
…Few State students get MBAs, but plenty leave campus with STDs.
…The only requirement for students looking to enroll at State is that they have two arms, two legs, and a face.
…and others. I mean, I would love to include jokes like that in this entry, but obviously, I can’t. Such is life. Also, I know that plenty of smart people decide to attend State and it’s probably not fair to make jokes like those, but it’s just too easy (and fun).
Anyway, I knew going into the weekend the Bulldogs are a very average team. They are right around .500 in league play this year. A split would not have raised an eyebrow from me. But getting swept? That’s just not good enough. The season is still far from over, and they will have a chance to make a run in the WCHA playoffs. I just hope they start playing better hockey again before then.