Not Finding Bigfoot

I'm not quite sure what wonderful potion is in the water at the offices of Animal Planet, but I want it running through my pipes. First, "Whale Wars" came into my life. Now, I have discovered "Finding Bigfoot".

From the people who brought you a show about incompetent morons trying to save whales, we now bring you a show about incompetent morons traipsing through the woods in a new location every week, looking for a mythical creature, howling at the top of their lungs, and hitting trees with baseball bats!

The show is about the Bigfoot Research Organization, a group who searches in vain trying to prove that Sasquatches exist. My favorite character is Bobo, a lumbering oaf who has one of the most amazing voices ever (Seriously, a million times better than that homeless announcer guy) but probably could never be a professional announcer because I'm not entirely convinced he can read. Another character is the actual biologist who is probably a lesbian and is definitely the most respectable member of the cast. She is so questioning at all times, I actually think she doesn't even really believe in Bigfoot and just goes along for the ride because it is a really easy paycheck.

The funniest part of the show is when they say things like, "We know Bigfoots turn grey as they age, just like humans," or "A Sasquatch knocks on trees to communicate with each other." How can they possibly know this?!? They almost certainly don't exist. Honestly, if these things are real, why don't we have any corpses anywhere, or an accidental hunting shooting, or one in a zoo somewhere? It is impossible to me that these enormous creatures could hide this well. Even if they do exist, we have never had one in captivity in order to study them, learn how they age and communicate, etc. Passing these things off as fact to people like me is humorous. Doing it to people who believe almost seems cruel. It will make other believers try this nonsense themselves, and waste their times too. The other hilarious thing is they maim the word Sasquatch and turn in into verbs, like, "These woods are very Squatchy!"

I must say though, other than the biologist, I truly do believe that these people believe what they are saying and in the Bigfoot. I just don't know why. I've seen virtually every episode of "MonsterQuest". These mythical creatures are just that; myths. I understand that it is cool to believe in these things, but this world is an incredible place with thousands of amazing creatures already. We don't need to invent any more.

Plus, who am I to laugh at them? They are doing something they love, have a TV show, I'm sure are compensated well, and I'm me. BFRO 1, Tom 0. Besides, I love (laughing at) this show, so I hope they don't stop hunting anytime soon.

Lazy Sundays

Sundays are the best. Other than my sisters grad party, this has been a pretty usual Sunday for me. It's Father's Day, so I got my old man a card and all, but I don't have any legitimate children so it's not like I'm getting any presents today.

One of the best things about my new job is we are closed on Sundays, so I'm always off (obviously). Saturdays are my favorite night to go out, so I usually feel like a sandwich that was left on the counter all night when I wake up on Sunday. After awhile, I move from the bed to the couch, flip the TV on, and sleep some more. Golf and baseball are my nap companions this time of year. Fast food is a regular Sunday staple too, because if there is one thing I dislike, it's cleaning, but if there's another thing I dislike, it's preparing food. It seems like it would be cool to learn how to cook, but I have fantasy baseball and this stupid thing to concentrate my "talents" on right now.

Once Nap #2 is over, I'm usually feeling less terrible, so instead of napping through TV, I actually watch TV. If I'm feeling especially nimble, I may watch TV and surf the internet all at once. Sunday TV is great, even when football is over. Family Guy, River Monsters, and now Whale Wars is back again! Holy shit what a hilarious show! Don't get me wrong, I'm not pro-whaling, but watching those bumbling pot smoking morons "fight" the whalers is fantastically pathetic. It harkens me back to "Grizzly Man", which is the best comedy I've ever seen. He named the bears, he felt like he was one with the bears, then he was digested by the bears. Maybe some people don't see the humor in someone invading the habitat of a group of bears, thinking they care for him then beaing eaten by them, but I do.

Believe it or not, sleeping all day makes it tough to go to bed early, so I'm usually up pretty late. I think the reason Mondays are so shitty is that it's so hard to get my body clock back to that time frame. Anyway, this was a pretty pointelss post. I was almost too lazy to even do it. I'm being way too productive for a Sunday right now. TV time for Tommy Boy.